WHO AM I AS A TEENAGER?

Who really am I as a teenager?

I remember my days in the junior secondary when Procter & Gamble used to come and market their Always Sanitary Pads. It used to be embarrassing been called to the school hall to be lectured about puberty, its signs and body changes toping it will with the menstrual cycle, all that comes with it and given free sample sanitary pads as souvenirs, eww...., that was so gross, especially when I had not even had my first period.  

That was simply taking the embarrassments to a height; imagine going to the school hall without your school bag and having to carry the sanitary pads in your hands with some manual about your reproductive system works, lolzzz….. I remember  begging my mum to buy me a bra because everyone one was wearing it and dint have one, but she insisted on me wearing the slips she buys for me until my God-mother came some day with a training bra, yay!!! I was so glad; I started feeling like I’m gradually becoming an adult.  I remember having a crush on one fine boy in my class, an epic crush I must say, we used to smile at each other even though we never used to speak to each other, but had our best friends as friends that served as middle men, lolzzzzz….. I remember how I used to spend several minutes infront of the mirror, trying to see what my body looked like, if my curves were formed and my face was pretty enough, because being a bit pretty was way below the needed standards. Good old funny days I must say, wanting to feel, act and be regarded as an adult, but really was I an adult?

Who really is a teenager and why do we act the way we do, always anxious, wanting to be seen, heard and popular, why are we like that? The teenager is also referred to as an adolescent, with ages between 13 and 19, we are no longer children, but we are developing into adults. Because we are in this transition stage, character-wise, we are usually moody, insecure, argumentative, impulsive, impressionable and at times, reckless and rebellious. Physically, we are having odd growth spurts, acne, odd sleeping pattern and we could have snobbish behavior at times. Ouch, why all these negatives, does that mean the teenage phase is a terrible phase? The answer is NO!!! It just happens during that phase because we are yet to be defined, we are trying to find an identity for ourselves and we need to establish our social standing and we are at this stage developing intellectually, more than when we are younger. At this stage, we have our hormones raging, we naturally have the energy to do a lot of explorations and adventure, but we have no experiences to give us the needed guiding wisdom, hence, we get it wrong a lot of times.

Researchers found that at the end of childhood, the brain undergoes significant changes during this stage, our brains at this stage have been found to be very unique with the sections responsible for planning and nerve connectivity, making it difficult for us to read social situations and other people’s emotion, hence, we fail to see the consequences of our actions, we really don’t give a flip what others think about us, just let us be. Research has also shown that the brain at this stage has less activity in the area responsible for motivation and risk assessment, hence our indulgence in risky behaviors like drug and alcohol abuse, smoking habit and illicit sex, all for the experience since our brain is down in that section.

Since research has told me I don’t have to feel guilty for some of the bad trait I kind of want to exhibit at times, my brain and nature have to be blamed for that, my question is, do I have to be a terrible teenager? The answer is NO! Why? Because if teenage hood is preparing me for adulthood, that means the habits I develop as a teenager would be my habit as an adult and if they are morally wrong habit, I will be less likely to be a responsible adult.

I really want to be a responsible and successful adult that my parents and sibling would be proud of, how do I achieve that? Research said the part of my brain responsible for self-control is developed at this stage, then, I think, I better put it to use. I need to think of the kind of adult I want to grow and become, look for adults like that around me, make friends with them, make them my mentor, hopefully, they will have my time and answer my questions when I’m confused and guide me with their experience since I’m yet to have them.

Seriously speaking, the teenage period is an interesting and delicate period, yes, I had all the fun I wanted as a teenager, especially since I had little responsibilities to tie me down, but I had to have boundaries, because I had adults that I dint not like what their lives looked like around me and did not want to end up like them. I dint want to end up a gambler, a cigarette, alcohol or drug addict, especially seeing some elderly guy on my street that looks so fine but acts retarded because of his alcohol and cocaine addiction, God forbid I be like him.  I wanted to grow up looking beautiful with a career and not just a job like some elder cousins of mine, I had to become their leach and they accepted me that way, took me to places I know I could not afford and say what a good life I could have if I can just exercise a bit of self-control and discipline. Yes, they did something wrong when they were younger which they told me about and they wish I never make their mistakes. So, I had my fun, learnt my lessons and now, I’m so grown……